Most people immediately think of romantic partners when hearing the word “relationship”, and while this is one type of relationship, there are also many others. We have relationships with our parents, siblings, friends, co-parents, coworkers, and so on. Along with this, relationship therapy is not just for couples. It’s for any two (or more) people who care about each other and want to strengthen their connection, navigate conflict, or heal from hurt. That might mean a mother and adult daughter learning to communicate differently, two siblings rebuilding trust after years of distance, a romantic couple who feels disconnected and wants to reconnect with what brought them together, or co-parents who are struggling to find common ground as it relates to caring for their child while managing their own complex emotions and histories. 

The goal of relationship therapy isn’t to figure out who’s right and who’s wrong, and it’s also not about “fixing” each other. It’s about understanding what’s happening between you and how each person is being impacted, allowing you to show up differently in the relationship and better support one another.

How It Works

The first couple of sessions will be focused on getting to know your relationship. You’ll be asked about things like what brought you to therapy, the history of your relationship, communication styles, what conflict typically looks like, strengths, and what each of you hopes to get out of therapy. From here, you’ll start to move into the real work of relationship therapy.  While no two relationships are exactly alike and sessions will be tailored to meet your needs, here’s what you can generally expect in relationship therapy sessions:

• Guided Conversations: Often, we’ll discuss recent conflicts but this time, with more structure and support. In sessions, we’ll work on slowing things down to prevent impulsive reactions that likely played a role in the conflict to begin with. We’ll talk about what happened, how it felt, and how to handle things differently in the future.
• Improving Communication: Communication is at the heart of most relationship issues. You’ll learn tools for listening with empathy, expressing needs and emotions more effectively, and having difficult conversations without escalating into arguments or shutting down.
• Exploring Patterns: Many relationships fall into repeated cycles, especially during stress and conflict. We’ll look at what’s underneath those cycles and figure out how to shift them. Spoiler: the argument is never truly about the dishes being left in the sink.
• Focus on the Present and the Past: While the here-and-now and moving forward in a positive direction are the main focus, you’ll also look at how past experiences may be influencing current behavior.
• Rebuilding Trust: If there’s been hurt or disconnection, therapy can be a space for accountability, repair, and moving forward with more clarity. We’ll work together to name the impact, take responsibility where needed, and rebuild trust step by step.
• Moving Beyond the Problem: Relationship therapy is about much more than just “fixing” the current problems you’re facing. It’s about shifting away from blame and problem-focused thinking, and instead learning how to face challenges together.

When to Consider Relationship Therapy

Many people wait until their relationship is falling apart to reach out, but therapy doesn’t have to be a last resort. In fact, the longer you wait, the more difficult it is to change the patterns that become deeply ingrained. That said, even if your relationship is in crisis, you can still benefit from therapy. There’s no “too late” if both people are open to trying. Here are some common signs that relationship therapy might be helpful: 

• You’re stuck in the same argument loop 
• Trust has been broken and you’re unsure how to heal 
• You’re feeling more like roommates than partners
• Communication often leads to conflict or withdrawal
• You’re having trouble agreeing on next steps in parenting, planning, or decision-making
• Conversations quickly become emotionally charged. 
• You’ve started thinking that the only option is to cut off contact
• You’re having trouble understanding and validating one another’s perspectives 
• You want to strengthen your bond, even if things are “fine”

Even the strongest relationships hit rough patches, but with the right support, you can get through them. If you want to learn more about how you can benefit from relationship therapy, reach out to schedule a consultation with a licensed therapist today.